Cuban Friends 6.29.14

On Sunday, June 29th, we were visited by Odalys & Candido from Cuba. Below is the main body of their message, along with Beth Henricks’s message to the Children of our Meeting.

Children’s Message from Beth Henricks:

So what do I have here? It’s a beach ball, I know, but it represents the world. We have some special guests today, our Friends from Cuba. I want to show you where Cuba is in the world. See the United States? This green island right here is called Cuba. That is where our Friends are from. Do you know how Quakers got to Cuba? Over 100 year ago, that’s a long time, probably before even your grandparents were born, there were two men on a boat. One of them was named Zenus Martin, kind of a funny name, and the other was Lorenzo Baker. They were on a boat sailing around Cuba. Lorenzo had a fruit company and was going to Cuba to get bananas. Lorenzo said to Zenus, “You are a Quaker, and you need to go to Cuba and share the story of Christ and Quakerism there.”  Zenus, who was from Iowa, where Ruthie is from, said, “I can’t do that! Leave my home and go to Cuba and start a mission there? I don’t have the money to that.” So Lorenzo, who had the banana company, gave him money to start a mission in Cuba. The Quakers in Iowa gave some money, and then other Quakers around the United States gave money, and Zenus said, “I think God is calling me to Cuba.” And he went. He started a Quaker mission in Cuba and it’s grown since then. So I was thinking about how God talks to us. Sometimes, God talks to us through other people. God talked to Zenus, through Lorenzo, who wasn’t even a Quaker. Sometimes God talks to us through our friends, sometimes God talks to us through our parents. And you know what? Sometimes God even talks to us directly, and we can hear the voice of God.

Odalys:

The Lord calls us. The Lord congregates us. And the Lord unites us in faith. A faith, hope and love. He is present among us to transform our minds, to transform our lives, and to transform our ways. To fill us with hope and joy. In this beautiful morning we greet you, and we welcome you to the house of the Lord. Please receive warm greetings from Cuba Yearly Meeting. We give thanks for the opportunity to be able to share with all of you. We do not have words to gratify God for this special moment. May God bless you all in a very special way.

Scripture Reading of Matthew 16:13-19:

Now when Jesus came into the district of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, ‘Who do people say that the Son of Man is?’ And they said, ‘Some say John the Baptist, but others Elijah, and still others Jeremiah or one of the prophets.’ He said to them, ‘But who do you say that I am?’ Simon Peter answered, ‘You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.’ And Jesus answered him, ‘Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father in heaven. And I tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not prevail against it. I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.’

Candido:

I give thanks to God for being here. In this community of Quaker faith, sharing with all of you, Quakers and non-Quakers. I give thanks because the spirit of God goes beyond language and any barrier. For the Spirit, there is only one language, one universal language, and that is the language of love. I am sure that’s the one we are feeling this morning. Before coming to the United States, I could speak, because I had seen movies, and I have spoken to people about this country, but not until I came, and I was able to share with my brothers and sisters my travels, I couldn’t speak certainly about what was lived in the United States. Let’s pray.

            Lord and good God, our Friend and brother, Father and Mother of all of our lives, we ask you that in this time you guide us with your spirit. That you will bless us. And that you illuminate the way in which we walk. Allow us to be filled by your spirit, in that we may be able to give thanks to you for the blessing that we are now receiving. In the name of your son, Jesus Christ, Amen.

Many times when we go through a path that we have never walked, we are afraid. We feel fear because it is unknown to us, and because we aren’t capable of what we can find there. It means that the fear, it goes away, when we come to know the place. We come to know a place when we live, when we share, and when we are able to feel the pain of others in our own lives. When we walk in their shoes. I ask myself, how much did Peter know Jesus? Peter had walked with him. Had come to know his teachings. Peter was a common man. Peter earned his living by fishing to feed his family. Peter did not know Jesus, and in the moment that he comes and shares his life with Jesus, in the moment that he shares his mistakes and virtues, He opens the doors of his heart to Jesus, so that He can live in him. He eats with him, he hears his teachings, he hears his silence, and he sees his practice of life. It’s when Peter comes to know him.

It is easy to speak about what other people say. Someone can say this, someone else can say that, this person can say something different, but it is very hard to come and say what we know and feel. It meant that Peter was coming into a relationship with Jesus. The knowing that He is the son of God, the living God. To come to know his humanity and his divinity. And to come to know his love for all humanity. To make mistakes and to suffer in that love. It’s when Jesus comes and says, ‘On you I will build my church’. I feel that now every one of us is Peter. In this time, Jesus asks us to have a rooted knowledge of him. We can see his face in all of the people that we see around us. I want you to look to your right and then to your left. You can see Jesus’s face on each one of us. There is the call of Jesus to love our neighbors as we love ourselves. From there, the Quaker knowledge of inner light, interior Christ, and why not interior fire. An interior fire that unites us all beyond the frontiers and barriers of faith. Beyond the barriers of knowledge. What unites us is the love of God and the celebration of the life of Jesus.

How can we now have the knowledge of Jesus? How can we aspire to this divine knowledge? The answer is very close to us. When we love without limits and barriers, and that’s what Jesus did. He loved until it hurt him. Mother Teresa said, “We should love until it hurts.” We will only be capable of loving when we come to know the people around us. When we know their problems, their joys, the things that make them sad and their celebrations, because that’s what Jesus did. He came to know what happen to his disciples and what happened with the people around him. We can only love the things that we know, the things that we can place a sacrificial value on. No one that has a piece of jewelry that is worth ten cents will take care of it like someone who has a piece of jewelry that they paid three thousand dollars for it. For that reason we have to consider our brother and sister like the Christ. In the moment that we can feel that love, that love that hurts enough, that will be the moment that our Lord, Jesus Christ will say, ‘On you, son or daughter, I will build my church.’ This is the great knowledge that Jesus gave us. All of the knowledge, all of the virtue, all of the truth are in these words. This is what I want to leave in your hearts this morning. A poem from Cuba, called Love Is.

To love is to forgive

What is more than to love is to comprehend

Love is to carry on the cross

And to nail yourself onto the cross

And die

And resurrect

Love is resurrection

Lets make out of love our resurrection.

That’s the message that Christ has given us for the rest of eternity. Amen. 

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If you would like to support the Cuban Friends, please send a donation to Friends United Meeting, 101 Quaker Hill Drive, Richmond, IN 47374. Secure credit card donations can be made at www.fum.org. 

Pastor Deborah Suess; Toward a Healthy Theology of Forgiveness...

June 8, 2014 Greensboro First Friends/June 15, 2014 Indianapolis First Friends        

Pastor Deborah Suess; Toward a Healthy Theology of Forgiveness...

resources: Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen, When Forgiveness Doesn't Make Sense by Robert Jeffress, Don't Forgive Too Soon: Extending the Hands that Heal by Dennis Linn.

 My beloved state of NC feels incredibly polarized these days – politically, religiously and beyond.… But two Saturdays ago – it felt like our state was momentarily unified as we remembered and honored the life of our beloved Dr. Maya Angelou. Her memorial service was in Winston Salem and live streamed … and much of North Carolina watched, prayed and gave thanks.

 Maya Angelou was a survivor in many ways. Her childhood was described as “too rough for words.” Yet on numerous occasions she said that one of the keys to not only her survival but to living with joy – has been learning how to forgive.   My-ah said she was able to forgive as she began (in her words) “to internalize, ingest the truth that I am loved / loved by God.”

In my experience, offering and receiving forgiveness is one of the most challenging and liberating calls of the Christian life. So after watching the memorial service, I decided to look into a bit more of what Dr. Angelou had to say about forgiveness and faith.

She was interviewed in 2013 for O Magazine. Oprah was one of the many women My-yah adopted as “sister/daughter.”  Here’s a portion of the interview.

Oprah asks: What would you say, sitting here where you are now, to that young calypso singer (you were) in 1957?

Maya answers:  I would encourage her to forgive. It's one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody. I mean, we ask the Creator to forgive our stupidest actions. The cruelest mean-hearted things. …So then you too forgive. It relieves you. You are relieved of carrying that burden of resentment. You really are lighter.

Oprah: I know you often say that love liberates us, but actually, forgiveness does?

Maya: …. you can't forgive without loving. And I don't mean sentimentality. I don't mean mush. I mean having enough courage to stand up and say, "I forgive. I'm finished with it."

Oprah: … You have taught me over the years that when you forgive somebody, it doesn't necessarily mean you want to invite them to your table.

Maya: Indeed not.. …... No, no, no. … [sometimes] it just means  I'm finished ….   /  

(and that too is forgiveness…)

AS a person of faith, My-yah took Jesus’ call to forgive seriously. .. And so do I.

In the prayer that Jesus taught us -- we hear the words: Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us.  As a forgiven people – we are called to forgive one another. But that does not mean it’s easy nor simple.  

I find it telling – that so very very much has been written about the topic in just the last 10-12 years. Books, articles, websites, blogs about various aspects of forgiveness now abounds …

And there is some incredibly helpful information out there. Unfortunately – there is also much of what I would call – kooky and even dangerous theology being taught and preached regarding the role of forgiveness in a person’s life. So … a good beginning place is to first consider:  What Forgiveness Is Not…

You are welcome to follow along in your bulletin.

First: Forgiveness is not indifference nor is it a pretense that an injury - an offense did not matter. Until we are honest about our actual feelings --   forgiveness has little meaning.  In other words –forgiveness is not denial. Rather forgiveness involves acknowledging the truth to ourselves, to God and (depending on the circumstance) sometimes to the one who caused injury.

Two: Forgiveness is not an antidote to hurting. Unfortunately – offering forgiveness does not magically take away the pain of injury. You may hurt for a long time … the good news is that forgiveness does help lead to healing and release. However, it is often slow, incremental, and a multi- layered process. I often think of the image of peeling away an onion.

Three: Forgiving is Not the same as forgetting. Thankfully hurtful memories often fade… but it is not required that we forgive and forget. Rather – I believe we can both remember and forgive.

Four: … Forgiveness does not mean a relationship will return to exactly the way it was before an offense.  By the grace of God, a relationship may indeed grow and become stronger, better, healthier… But the relationship will not be the same… ~ It’s been said that Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.”  (paul boese)  I love that.

Five: As My-yah Angelou puts it – forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to invite the person back to your table. Forgiveness is not the same as reconciliation. One can truly forgive and let go but also choose to not resume the relationship.

Six: Forgiveness doesn’t make a harmful action okay. Forgiveness is not justification nor condoning. While you may forgive, you may also say, “Never again …” 

Seven: Forgiving is not the same as pardoning. It is not letting a wrongdoer off the hook. There are often consequences to our behaviors … even though we’ve been forgiven. And it is not the same as accepting, excusing or tolerating. We may forgive what we cannot tolerate, overlook or ignore.

Eight: Forgiveness is not easy nor is it a one-size-fits all. What it looks like for you may be different than for me. The timing / the process/ the work/ the prayer that it involves … will differ from person to person / situation to situation.

Nine: Forgiveness is not something you have to do alone. It takes faith, courage and requires help. Help from God and often help from others – whether that be your best friend, spouse, your pastor, your therapist, spiritual director or your coach.  Forgiveness is not something you have to “journey through” alone….

Finally- Ten:  Extending Forgiveness is not primarily about the other but rather about our blessing, our release – (or as Dr. Angelou put it) our invitation to travel lightly.

To forgive another person from our heart is an act of liberation. We set that person free from the negative bonds that exist between us. We say, “I no longer hold your offense against you” But it doesn’t stop there. We also free ourselves from the burden of being the “offended one.”  In the words of Henri Nouwen - [When] we do not forgive those who have wounded us, we carry them with us or, worse, pull them as a heavy load. … Forgiveness, therefore, liberates not only the other but also ourselves.

 Amen.

Queries for Open Worship...

What does receiving/offering forgiveness look like in your life?

What is a “healthy theology” of forgiveness?

When in your life have you experienced forgiveness as grace, release or simply letting go?

Does the advice, "Don't Forgive Too Soon" speak to you?

Is the Spirit inviting you into the journey of asking for forgiveness, receiving forgiveness….or extending forgiveness to another?

Little Things Mean A Lot

Psalm 139:7-18
Ruthie Tippin, Indianapolis First Friends Meeting
 
Friends, this morning I had three different messages in my mind and one of them comes from my heart, so that is the one I am going to share with you today. The music that you’ve received this morning is a gift to you. A gift to our Mothers on Mother’s Day, but a gift to us all from our handbells, and from Eric and the Choir. This is the last time they will be sharing their ministry to us this school year, and I just want to add my thanks to yours, to all of the musicians for their kindness, their work, and their ministry to the Meeting. It’s been a very powerful year, under the direction of Shawn and then Eric for the Choir and Lynda for the Bells; it’s been an incredible experience, and I want to thank each one of them for bringing ministry to us in ways that sometimes speak to those who are gathered, in ways that nothing else can. I am very thankful for that.
 
Yesterday I was privileged to serve in ministry for the wedding of Tom Heusel and Lori Marshall as they gathered into union. After the wedding I was sitting in the hallway, and a little girl was there. I complimented her on her really pretty necklace, and I said, “I have a necklace, too.”  I showed her my heart - this locket. Before you know it, she pulled out of her little purse a locket - she didn’t have it on a chain – I was just the heart. I opened mine up and said, “Look what I have inside… these are my two boys. Here’s Matt and here’s Seth. They gave me this locket a long time ago.” She opened up her locket, and she didn’t have any pictures in there. She said, “I’m going to put a picture of my daddy and me in my locket.”
 
I’m going to ask you today to allow yourselves to put God and you in your ‘locket’ and allow God to be your mother today. Allow God to be your mother today. Some of us are blessed, some of us are so blessed, to have had mothers who knew God, who knew how to nurture, who knew how to love us, and we are so thankful today. We bring God praise and thanksgiving for the gift of mothering that we received.

But Mother’s Day is kind of “tricky,” because not everyone has had that kind of experience. There are some children who never knew their mothers, and they are very curious about what ‘mothering’ is really like. Some children were adopted, and if you think in those terms, you actually have two mothers. I’m asking you to allow God to be your mother, and to be thankful for the mother who gave you birth and then gave you away, releasing you to your adoptive mother, who raised you, and then to God, who mothered over and through all of that. 
 
Some of us have mothers who did not know how to nurture, and perhaps were even abusive. That’s very difficult, when you are celebrating Mother’s Day and it’s a ‘Hallmark Card’ kind of day - and you don’t have a Hallmark card kind of feeling. “When you care enough to send the very best.” Really, God? Was that the very best? So here is what I want you to think. Mother God… She was with you. She was with you, and you lived through it. You survived because of God’s strength in you. Now, allow God, in God’s love, to be your true Mother and love you through all of that. And understand that that person, your mother had choices, and perhaps her choices were informed by her mother’s choices. Allow God to mother her as well.
 
Some of us, are fathers who are mothers, and that’s a real challenge, but God knows what that’s all about! Scripture tells us that God knows how to gather…. God is like a mother hen gathering the chicks under her wings. God knows what it’s like to be a Mother. And we thank God for our fathers who raised us as mothers. God is loving us as mothers do.
 
As you move through Mother’s Day, allow God to be your mother. As you move through your life, and you see all the changes in your life, in the way God anticipates love, allow God to anticipate the love that you need. Allow God to be the love that you need. Allow God to bring you to that beautiful place of mothering, and open yourself to be free to accept the mothering of God with thanksgiving, with blessing. For those of you, who like me, have lost your mother to death, remember that nothing is lost to God. Remember that no-one is lost. None of your loving experiences are lost in God.
 
Now I’m going to ask you to do something today. I’m going to ask you to cup your hands together, and put yourself in the middle of your hands. And then I’m going to ask you to imagine God looking down on you as God does all the time, holding you. Now put one hand on top of the other, forming a hollow nest.  This is Mother God, one hand over the other, protecting you. And then I want you to open your hands, and make them fly, knowing that God is freeing you, in God’s love to move on, to move on in love, knowing that God always loves. Allow God to love you in those ways, and allow God to love through you.
 
Some of you have wanted to be a mother. Some of you have wanted to be a mother and that has not come. Allow God to mother through you and see that God, Mother God, is already doing that work. You cannot imagine how many of God’s children are being loved through your love. Come and find the quiet center in yourself and allow God to speak into that center, whether it’s the center of your heart, the center of your womb, the center of your mind, the center of your being. Allow God to center you, in mother love.
 
Let us sing together, ‘Come and Find the Quiet Center’… ‘find the room for hope to enter’, as we begin our time of open worship.  
 
Amen.